don't leave me high

when i got home, there was a message on my machine from my cousin greg. the first thing i thought was how grown up he sounded; ironic, since he is older than i am. the second thing i thought was how nice it was to be "looked up". tomorrow i plan to give him a call. ill let you know if he's the same good ol' crazy greg.

interesting that i get that call from greg, when just yesterday i was looking through the cardboard box labeled 'stephanies letters - do not read'. i didnt get caught up in reading too many of them, since i knew i would not accomplish what i needed to do, which was pare them down a bit and then put them into a storage container less likely to allow bugs while in storage.

but i couldnt helping looking at a few, and today, they are still on my mind.
letters from brian, giving me advice about how to feel happier in life and how he enjoyed his first concert, scorpians.
letters from kim, as she travelled all over the states with her grandparents, with tidbits of gossip strewn throughout - always ending with LILACS or BFF.
letters from melissa, written on work stationery; one was only a week or so after she moved out, it was no doubt meant to reassure me, but only made me miss her more. another that wrote about a sad night she was having, another full of witty remarks, while another helped me get a raise from my job while commenting on my english short story.
letters from emily, telling me she loved me, in her fast, hurried script. notes handed between classes, notes passed at the meetings (hehe). notes with questions about others, and who was coming over this weekend?
letters from deb, a graduation card she made with her own drawings. a letter she wrote to me when i was in CA, saying she missed me, her print fastidious and proper, and always a little drawing to the side. (some things never change)
even a note or two from andrew. i am sorry but his are sort of hard to read. something about ninj turturs. hehe
several from him, full of lies.
two from him, telling me he wished we had talked about what happened that summer.
a postcard and a letter from him, making me feel nostalgic for what never existed.

and then, with exasperation, i closed the lid.